Hero,,

There's a hero,
If you look inside your heart,
You don't have to be afraid of what you are,
There's an answer,
If you reach into your soul,
And the sorrow that you know will melt away.

[chorus]
And then a hero comes along,
With the strenght to carry on,
And you cast your fears aside and you know you can survive,
So when you feel like hope is gone,
Look inside you and be strong,
And you'll finally see the truth that a hero lies in you.

It's a long road,
When you face the world alone,
No one reaches out a hand for you to hold,
You can find love,
If you search within yourself,
And the emptiness you felt will disappear.

[chorus]

Lord knows,
Dreams are hard to follow,
But don't let anyone tear them away,
Hold on,
There will be tomorrow,
In time you'll find the way.

[chorus]

That a hero lies in.....you______
Ooohh that a hero lies in.....you_____________

Forgive and Move On

"To forgive is to set a prisoner free and discover that the prisoner was you"

"Dan ingatlah Tuhanmu dalam hatimu dengan rendah hati dan rasa takut, dan dengan tidak mengeraskan suara, pada waktu pagi dan petang, dan janganlah kamu termasuk orang-orang yang lengah"


Forgive and Move On!


-In Their Shoes-

"How cud he/she do this to me?"
pertanyaan ini sering muncul untuk orang yang sudah menyakiti kita. Sekarang, coba tempatkan diri kita pada posisi orang tersebut.
Apa sih yang bikin dia tega menyakiti kita?

Apakah itu "pure" karena ke-egoisannya atau kita hanya dapat karma dari tindakkan kita sebelumnya?

Dengan memposisikan diri kita sebagai dia, kita akan tahu, apa motif utama dia sekaligus instropkpesi diri.


-Every Mirror Have Two Sides-

Hanya karena seseorang telah menyakiti kita (dapat juga sekelompok orang), bukan berarti orang tersebut adalah evil monster yang ga punya sisi kebaikan sama sekali. He/she only a human yang juga punya sifat mau menang sendiri, egois dan lain sebagainya.

Mungkin dia juga berada dalam pengaruh orang lain juga hal lain yang membuatnya bertindak sejauh itu.

Jadi coba ingat-ingat sifat baik dia. Misalnya teman kita ga bisa jaga rahasia, tapi dia selalu ngebela kita dalam situasi apa pun. Terima dia apa adanya walau kita nggak harus terus-terusan bergaul sama dia dan terus menerus memakluminya.


-Don't Be Drama Queen-

Kalau segala cara sudah kita coba, namun kiat belum juga dapat memaafkan, saatnya untuk instropeksi diri lagi.

Apakah kita juga terlalu berlebihan menilai kejadian yang bikin orang tersebut nggak bisa termaafkan?!

Apalagi kalau di setiap kesempatan kita berusaha membuat orang lain bersimpati sama kita dan berbalik membenci orang tersebut. That's really un-fair!

Ayo kita buka hati kita lebar-lebar supaya lebih mudah memaafkan!


-Get Over It and Move On-

Membuat seseorang merasa bersalah seumur hidupnya tidak akan dapat mengubah masa lalu. Bisa-bisa malah kita yang tersiksa karena terus-terusan hidup dalam amarah dan dendam.

So, its better to forgive and left it behind.

Its really hard to forgive if we never really forget. It's two different things.

Melupakan adalah menganggap sesuatu tidak pernah terjadi sehingga kita nggak belajar dari pengalaman. Sedang memaafkan adalah berhenti mempermasalahkan suatu hal, mengambil hikmahnya dan move on ur life!


"The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong"

Yes, You! ,,my lovely,,

I never Had a friend like u,,

Till the day that I find u,,

Eventhough I pretend that I cud strong,,

Ur always be my baby,,


Really, I never had a friend like u,,
A wonderful woman that beat me, tells me, advice me,,care me,,

Dun ever let my hand break up from you,,
As the GOD love me,,I love u too,,and I know u do,,

A strong hold best friends,,

Tell my wrong,,
Remind my mistakes,,

Thank you,,for being with me
In lonely day and cold night

In suffer and glad,,

Thanks for accept me as I am,,

Thanks for the statement “U get what u give, Ai”.

Thank You,,

For ATPS, and My Hime,,

Uhibukifillah ukhti,,

I Love u,,i Do,,

14 Februari 2008, 19:47

Assalamu’alaykum


What do I say?

Assalamu’alaykum.

Breath,,leaves,,wind,,smooth rain

I love You

I love today,,

I love this day,,

How is today passing?

With woke up late,,but I already make an azzam to myself that I’ll read one juz of Qur’an today. Then I went to college, hurry in black black dress from TOP to Bottom, got into the car that my daddy drives.

I met my charming lady today,,and that she cries,,that she cried,,ououou,,

What an amazing story that she tell me,,

About the surgery,,

“When I look at even a pencil fell over from sumbodys table I wud hurry take and give it back. This is my time, I have to collect sum score, I cud die,,anytime,,”

“I dun wanna share, I always think that you and others have more time than me,,so, I only want Allah”

“When I finished my surgery and the doctor said that im totally secure, when I heard Adzan, feels like I wanna run to masjid and said ‘Allah,,Allah!!this is me,,! Im coming to you, thanks GOD u let me life again,,GOD, truly I am fallin in love to you, I Love You, Allah,,”

“u know a robot, Ai?we created it once, if that robot behave nicely we’ll like it, and gonna put on sum of its superiority more, when once that robot do sumthin bothered you, maybe u’ll gonna throw it up or switch of its battery, then if human feel this way,,what about Allah?”

“U know ur way, Ai, but dun wanna follow it, u want that way who follow u, while that impossible to be,,”

GOSH! GOSH! GOSH!

Please show me the way, lead me to the right path, dun ever let me go,,
I wanna find my way back,,into d light,,that shining brightly,,by ur love, GOD,,

Breath,,breath,,breath,,
Winds,,the clouds,,leaves,,
Air,,the rain,,

I Love You,,

I Love You,,

I Love You,,Allah,,

What about Noura?

Aku mau curhat,,

Siapa sih yang sebenarnya hypocrit? Aku?

I keep walking, i keep smiling but actually i hate. Who cares of ur background?now that life is a choice whether u gonna smile throughout it or not?but some ayat, that keeps burning me, some gud people that keep burning me,,,

There's a gud statement here

"To forgive means u set someone free from a prisoner and to knowing that the prisoner is you,,"

I must not! but i do.

But actually i hate,,

"Tuhan,,maafkan diri ini yang tak pernah bisa menjauh
dari bayang tentangnya,,"

That that person is not mine
that that person is not mine

"Bila Sally mencariku,,biarkan dia terbang jauh,,
dalam hatinya hanyaku, dalam hatinya hanyaku,,
hingga dia lelah menanti
hingga dia lelah menangis"

,,and i just wanna be alone, achieve sumthin that i able to, smoothly, silently,,

Let me make my own colour
let me live the life that i choose
let me be gud

STOP it! STOP it!
this is life, man! take life easy!

Take the life easy,,
who do i ask?
mom?
dad?
ur brother?
who?

arum?
who?
ur fellows?
why?
who them?

Then what about noura?
that she being treathen so many times
so long times
so hurt but cant speak
being possesive in her subsconsious mind
she just didnt mean to
cant anyone understand?
thats the reason why there is GOD.

But i dunno

and i dun want

and i hardly to believe

why shud i?

its kinda an anger
and i want to show it up to others,,

but its unfair Ai, when u makes people think the one u hate is the bad one.

while mirror have two side

im just doing this
doing what i know

though maybe
maybe i make mistake

eh?

"Bagaimana mungkin seseorang merasa kesepian
jika begitu banyak yang sedang ia lakukan untuk orang lain?"

Ai, honey,,take a breath darling,,here is sumthin that say,,

"I never had a friend like you, tiil the day that i find you
even though i pretend that i cud strong, u always be my baby,,"

U have never been have her, her,,and her,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,
now that they are a gift from you,,
u got a friends
u r not alone, ai,,

I Want My Life That Is MINE!!!!

"I want my life that is mine!!" said Sayuri in the Memoirs of a Geisha.

World of women, that what Geisha life is, a totally world of women. A Geisha is allow to be pregnant by their client, if the baby is girl, that girl become a Geisha, if the baby is boy, he is going to kicked out, homeless. There is no place for man in the Geisha's house.

They cant listen to what their heart say because Geisha is created to spoil man ego who pay them high. They cant be in love with any man, they cant be free, its hard to have the life that is belongs to them. What about me?

Geisha, in that movie, wear a beautiful dress called kimono, a japanese traditional dress. And as we know, in india we have saree, a women clothes, a beautiful 5 meters ,material to wear. And start by this, people begin to compare which one is better, kimono or saree?

I like to see beautiful girl with their skill in a beautiful colourful dress. But alas, i dont have any saree, in the Memoirs of Geisha, there a scene when a Danna want to open Sayuri's kimono, and whats a suprising because Sayuri wear many many dress inside her kimono, it show me that its kinda tuff to wear and it'll be pretty hot.

So that, as for me, i prefer saree than kimono.

I still remember how i get my pink saree. I still remember how it smeel at the first time i receive that. It wa a gift that i never imagine before,,

I admiring India much, let say im dying, start from the meaning of my name i turn to interested in some of things of India such song, the language, the hinduisma, taj and wishing i cud wear indian dress even visit India someday.

Sometimes i watch Bollywood movie to learn their language and dance.

And one day i met an anjana (a stranger man) he is Indian in face, but im not sure. Then my friend and i bravely say hello to that man and i start to get close with that person.

He is an American professor, but he is originally from South India. After some times that we passed with talk and laugh, he told me, in a moment that he will go to his mothers place, Tamil for 2 weeks and they get to Bandung again and then continue his journey, come home to U.S "I really miss my wife, i miss mu daughter" that what he sais when his friend called him once,,oh so sweet.

Then i didnt wait i ask him, if maybe he cud buy me a saree from India.

I was busy with my score that day, when i receive a call
"Hello?" i said
"Hello! Hi Sundari, How are you?"
"Im fine, Sir"
"Sundari, can we meet now?in the usual place that we always meet?"
"Ya, sure"
"I'll be waiting for you in double helix coridor,OK?"
"OK, im going now".

I was wondering and also happy that he already come back from India, then we met and he gave me,,,

"Saree!!! Pink Saree!!" my heart scream out happy. its in a plastic, blue sky plastic. Im afraid to open it, i just hold it close to my body, and we begin our conversation.

Its a goodbye time. So sad, but he have to go.

I run, run and run to my prodi, there where i open the saree and try to suit it. Its a long long material, its fragrant, and my friends keep their eye on that try to touch, try to reach try to smell.

That time im very happy. Im very happy. Im very Happy. Im very Happy.

Thank You, Mr. Raj.

My daddy's patient

I dunno,,but i think maybe i have to write down my story.

It feels like a very long journey to knowing the truth that my heart always speak up..

When u look at my eyes, what do u see?
Is that the same like what u see 5 years ago?
Two years ago?
One year ago?

Is that the same eyes that screaming
And suffering from such a violence?

Is that the eyes that tell you innocently,,
Im not happy.

Being weird, being freak, being unique, being un-extraordinary
Alas,,a wrong way,,the lust that speak,,follows the step of what heart say,,

Bored of being bad, wanna change to good, but the way isnt easy,,

The begginig wasnt the middle,,the middle isnt the future,,

Climb high and drop off.

Shud i feel what i feel?
Shud i be a man completely?


Say that im hypocrit, i do.
Say im trying to be good, i do.
Say that im weird, i am.

Im not innocent, guys,,i always pretend to be good, while i dunno who me.
Do this and that because of you, not because of Lord!!

What do i want to do?
Walkin down step by step?
Be good and try appreciate myself?
Try to let me know that i may live and not anyone else who say,,

Try to achieve whatever little think that i done well,,

Hah?

The situation is even wrose since i dislike my study,,

My oh My lord,,
Thanks for a nice dad for a struggle mom.

What a patient daddy he is..